Prevention is the best tool to eliminate sexual harassment in the workplace. We encouraged employers to take the necessary steps to prevent sexual harassment from occurring. Companies should clearly communicate to employees that sexual harassment will not be tolerated. Companies can do so by establishing an effective complaint or grievance process by taking immediate and appropriate action when an employee complains. The US Military has a very clearly stated policy on Sexual Harassment:
“…Our policy on sexual harassment is crystal clear. We believe that sexual harassment is wrong, ethically and morally. We believe it is wrong from the point of view of military discipline. And we believe it is wrong from point of view of maintaining proper respect in the chain of command. And for all of these reasons therefore, we have a zero tolerance for sexual harassment.“
• Secretary of Defence William J. Perry, November 13, 1996
What You Should Not Do
If you are a victim, Don’t blame yourself. Sexual harassment is not something someone “asks for“ or “deserves” . It’s not your fault. Blame the person who is causing the problem: the harasser. Don’t delay – Don’t try to out-wait the situation; delaying will only let the harassment continue and make it more difficult to take action. Don’t keep it to yourself. Being quiet lets the harasser continue and can make you feel isolated and helpless. There may well be other people in the same situation already and there will certainly be someone else in the future.
Preventing Harassment in the Workplace
Men: Watch what you say. How Gender Sensitive are you? Men “respond” to how women look because men are wired to be highly aroused by visual cues. But remember that you are responsible for what comes out of your mouth and for what your hands do. They do not have independent lives of their own.
Women: Watch what you do. Learn to verbally diffuse a situation and to defend yourself. Dress appropriately. A woman is responsible for the signal she sends. Why advertise what you don’t plan to deliver at the workplace? There is a big difference between being feminine and flaunting sexuality. Be careful of sending the wrong signals. Short skirts and see-through blouses may send messages that were not intended. The workplace should not be a sexually provocative place. You should be aware of female-male differences and dress and behave and communicate accordingly. State your thoughts and feelings clearly and forcefully. Practice technique “I feel … when you … and I want.“ No joking, teasing, flirting in response to a man’s inappropriate comments if you do not wish it to escalate. You should take a businesslike approach.
Men: Be aware of female-male differences. You should dress, behave and communicate accordingly. If in doubt, Don’t. If not in doubt, ask. Your goal is to protect your self. Express your interest safely. Exercise a businesslike approach as initiator or responder. Don’t let women bait you! Stay in control – Remember that “Familiarity Breeds…” The shared excitement of working together on a project can cause emotional spill-over. You can begin to see the other person differently.
Deficiencies in your personal life can make you more susceptible especially if you are not getting enough/any at home. If the attraction is real and you believe that it is really worth it, proceed with caution. Make sure that you know the risks involved. Remember that there are many sides to us. The person you experience at work may only be one minor side. Remember the saying “Si mi versus come live wid me”. How will you feel “tomorrow” or when the fling is over? Can you continue to work in the same place with a “lost love” or an “ex?”
Office Romance – The Bad
No matter how well the relationship is going, the situation itself is a recipe for disaster. The fact that couples are in constant contact with one another day and night may cause friction within the relationship. Everyone needs some “alone time” to pursue hobbies or hang out with friends, and the lack thereof may cause relationships to self-destruct. Office romances may interfere with individuals’ abilities to perform their professional duties. Imagine telling your girlfriend that she’s fired? There is always the potential for conflicts of interest between office situations and relationships. Accusations of favouritism may harm the morale of your colleagues.
Office Romance – The Ugly
If the relationship does not work out, will things become awkward?
If you are dating your colleagues:
- Rivalry and competition may harm the relationship
- Uncomfortable situations may arise after the break-up when career advancement issues come into play
If you are dating a subordinate:
- False accusations of favouritism may arise
- Possible accusations of sexual harassment after the break-up
- Be careful how you use power. “Betta fowl seh him come si dawg dead, dan dawg seh him si fowl dead”
- A subordinate cannot “freely” descent.
- It is not “fair” to put him/ her in a position that they might not want to be
If you are dating the boss:
- False accusations of favouritism may arise
- You may get FIRED after the break-up
It is always risky playing where you work (Or as they say, dipping your pen in the company’s ink). You should always think long and hard on the possible negative consequences. Be prepared for the worst – You may lose your relationship, your job, or even your career in just one stroke of bad luck. It is a good idea to apply the Golden Rule and treat others the way you would want to be treated.
The Litmus Test:
Before you say something risqué: ask yourself “How would your girlfriend/wife/mother react if they were listening to the comment?”
Developing a Sexual Harassment Policy
The workplace sexual harassment policy should provide examples of what constitutes harassment. The policies should state where complaints should be made. Employers need to be able to immediately respond to such complaints
This is very important! Speak to your lawyer about what will work best for your organization. The policies should advise employees that retaliation will not be tolerated. The policy should be clearly communicated to all employees. You should inform staff that the Company takes matters of sexual harassment very seriously and so will:
- Conduct a prompt investigation of all complaints
- Take appropriate action based upon that investigation
Any employee found to have engaged in any form of sexual harassment will be subject to appropriate disciplinary action up to, and including termination of employment. Every effort should be made to handle all complaints and investigations with as much discretion and confidentiality as circumstances permit. The Company should ensure that they do not tolerate any retaliation against any employee for making a complaint or for bringing inappropriate conduct to the Company’s attention, or for participating in an investigation of an alleged act of harassment.